Wednesday, July 17, 2024
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Divorce query: three, regret, questioning Shariah now

Fatwaa ID: 2369

Question:
Assalamalaikum WRWB. I would like kindly know about this matter, my husband pronounced divorce to me in July 2022 in state of anger and said he divorce me one and two are remaining. November 2023 we had an intense argument and I said leave me multiple times and he said I divorce you, we had intercourse night before, so does this divorce count at all? And within next 2 minutes my husband said he did not intend to divorce me but he said that in state of anger, and he took swear that he will never utter those words again, does this divorce count at all? Again we had an argument August 14,2024 and next day after intercourse due to intense argument I had to call police and my husband had no intention to divorce me but after seeing police he said divorce, divorce divorce in rage of anger. Next day he came home for apologizing and taking me back as his wife since he has done that in state of angriness. Does this divorce count? Is there any turning back? Are we divorced? Please help us with any possibility. Allah SWT said Marriage is completion of half deen and its Sunnah of beloved prophet Muhammad (Peace be upon him) and how can it be so quick to finish a marital relationship upon just uttering the word if it is done in state of anger but does not intend to by heart.

Answer:
In the Name of Allaah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salaamu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullaahi wa-barakaatuh.

We would like to firstly highlight that divorce issued in the state of anger is valid. Likewise, divorce issued after sexual intercourse or intimacy is valid. Furthermore, intention is irrelevant when using clear words of divorce. Moreover, regretting after divorce and swearing to never say it again does not undo a divorce. Damage is done once uttered.

We take note of the details of your query.
-We understand that your husband issued you one divorce in July 2022. This was a valid divorce. He then revoked this divorce during the ‘iddah period and took you back into his marriage, either verbally or through intimate actions.

-He then issued you a second divorce in November 2023. He again revoked this divorce during the ‘iddah period, either verbally or through intimacy and took you back into his marriage.

-He issued divorce for the third time on August 15, 2023, uttering the words thrice. (You wrote 2024 but we assume you meant 2023). This too was a valid divorce.

If the above reflects the reality, then all three divorces were valid. This thus resulted in a talaaq mughallazah, a permanently irrevocable divorce. Reconciliation is not possible unless a valid halaalah is found. Your ‘iddah had started on the 15th of August. It is most probably long done by now. If you had lived with him since then, then that was a life of zina and sincere tawbah and istighfaar must be made.

Shari’ah has emphasized the importance of being conscious and careful of one’s words. Words have consequences. Words of nikaah and talaaq are even more delicate and serious. Uttering them even jokingly will be consequential. The laws of the Shari’ah are quite clear. It is obvious in your situations that you and your husband failed to heed this and continued to use words of divorce irresponsibly. You reap what you sow. You did not value this great sunnah and union. You cannot blame the Deen for that now.

This may be a difficult verdict to digest and accept. However, it is as mentioned above. Your marriage has permanently broken up and you cannot reconcile with your husband. We sympathize with you and pray that Allaah Ta’aala grants you and him the strength and courage to move on. Accept the decree and focus on doing better in the future. Perhaps what is to come will be better than the past. Remain positive and optimistic.

And Allaah Ta’aala knows best.
Mufti Muajul I. Chowdhury
Darul Iftaa New York
https://askthemufti.us/

11/17/1445 AH – 05/25/2024 CE | 1102, 1128

وصل اللهم وسلم وبارك على سيدنا محمد وعلى ءاله وصحبه أجمعين

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