Fatwaa ID: 1932
Assalamu Alaikum. my father has 9 half siblings on his father’s side and for a long time my family and I up to a point have not connected with them. The last time they talked was around 16 years ago. Then a few weeks ago I started my quest to find contact informations of those half siblings. I succeeded and were able to talk to them for the first time. I haven’t let my mom know because it seems like she minds anyone from my family even my dad to talk to his half siblings. And on the other hand my father seems to be mad at one of his half siblings for not giving him the chance to speak to his father. I wanted to mediate things and asked my father if he wants to talk to his half siblings, but he says no, even though I really want him to. He however doesn’t mind me talking to them, but I know my mom will mid. I am also aware that cutting ties with kinship is haram in Islam. Am I able to force him to talk to his half siblings or try to connect my half uncles/aunts to my father without my father’s permission? Also am I allowed to hide talking to those half siblings from my mother? What are the limits in the communication I can reach. Jazakallah khayr
In the Name of Allaah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salaamu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullaahi wa-barakaatuh.
We commend you for your attempt to join ties of kinship. The Shari’ah has greatly emphasized on the importance of this. At the same time, it has severely warned those who break or do not maintain family ties. That is a major sin.
The half-siblings of your honorable father are part of the family and good ties need to be maintained with them. You have done the right thing by reaching out to them. Continue and strengthen that bond even if your parents do not support you in this. Do it for the sake of Allaah Ta’aala. As you strengthen the ties, make gradual attempts to reconnect your father with them as well. Speak good of your half-uncles in front of your father and vice-versa. You may even mention that one has praised the other or even give gifts on behalf of one. There may be history as to why they are separated by encourage them to forgive and move on.
You may study “Maintaining Family Ties” by Shaykhul Hadith Mawlaana Muhammad Zakariyya al-Kandahlawi (R). You may also study the chapters pertaining to maintaining ties of kinship from hadith works such as Riyaadh as-Saaliheen.
And Allaah Ta’aala knows best.
Mufti Muajul I. Chowdhury
Darul Iftaa New York
05/05/1445 AH – 11/19/2023 CE | 687
وصل اللهم وسلم وبارك على سيدنا محمد وعلى ءاله وصحبه أجمعين
Pdf of the above book is available from: https://archive.org/details/maintaining-family-ties-islam/mode/1up
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