Wednesday, July 17, 2024
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Talaaq Query

Fatwaa ID: 1658


Assalamu Alaykum Wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh,

Hope this message finds you & your family well. May Allah’s blessings, good health, success & protection be upon you and your entire family. Ameen.

I had a question in regards to Talaq.

Back in 2016, due to family issues. I had asked my husband for a Talaq. I wanted to seperate from him & my in laws. They did things that were not correct & I wanted to leave my husband & family forever. He had verbally given me a Talaq but he said he never meant it. He was not angry at me then. He did not want to say it & felt forced to say it. It was in the middle of the night & he did not want me to leave the house & just to cool the situation down he said Talaq as if he would say any other word. Just to give me peace of mind we would seperate but he wanted morning to come to speak more calmly with me about the entire situation & look to resolve it & we did. He wanted to still be with me & continue our marriage. With time things got better & we continued our marriage & family issues got better also with the in laws.

Over the years more family problems arised and we had given birth to our baby daughter. With more intense pressures. One day he got angry at me & gave Talaq in 2021. I felt quite depressed & was unhappy afterwards & was always on the alert what will I do if he gives me another Talaq. I just gave birth to a child & how would I raise her alone. Coming from a south asian family it is looked down upon to be divorced. I was living in fear. Tried my best to avoid arguments & mainly walked away when he seemed angry.

Years passed. We had good days but there were also some bad days & I felt he became detached & more of an introvert. At work he had stresses & he had many family issues & pressures. I tried my best to always be there for him. I would see his moods change often & his anger from everything else he would vent it all upon me instead sometimes even our baby daughter. I had reminded him that there is one more Talaq left & this would be final if he were to say it again. Today is the day he said it out of anger and he meant it this time also giving me Talaq.

Now I am in a situation. Where he regrets saying it. He wants me to get in touch with you to figure out what we can do. He doesn’t want to leave me and the baby. He says he meant it twice only. 2016 should not count according to him since he did not mean it and had said it to cool things down.

I think I’ve been very understanding towards him. Very supportive. Always loved him. Always placed him first. Never thought of a life without him. Just like he had to make sacrifices. I also did the same. I had suggested couple counseling many times to figure out what’s inside him bothering him. He bottles everything inside & then blows up like this out of anger. I cannot keep guessing what’s in his mind & heart & a neutral person would best suggest us & counsel us. I did not want a family member so everything remains confidential & without any bias. He constantly refused for help.

Today I felt the hurt the most. Everything came collapsing down. I’ve always warned him about his temper & what it would lead to & I know he would regret his decision. Talaq is not a joke.

Your suggestions or advice as a father would bring some light in a dark place that I am in today with my child as I have no mother or father to consult.

Hope to hear from you.
Jazak Allahu Khairan

In the Name of Allaah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salaamu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullaahi wa-barakaatuh.

We take note of the details of your query. May Allaah Ta’aala make it easy for you. May He bless your daughter and make her the coolness of your eyes.

It is important that one is extremely cautious with his words, especially that of talaaq. Once uttered, talaaq takes place irrespective of whether one meant it or not. In the enquired situation, unfortunately, all three talaaqs are valid and binding. The marriage has irrevocably broken. There is no reconciliation unless a valid halaalah takes place. Your ‘iddah has started from the time he uttered the last divorce.

We understand that this may be a difficult predicament upon you. However, place your trust upon Allaah Ta’aala and make du’aa for the best. Perhaps, He has something better in store for you. Allaah Ta’aala saw your selfless efforts and kindness and He will surely reward you for that. Frequently send salawaat upon Nabi ﷺ and make abundance of istighfaar. Through this, Allaah Ta’aala will make things easy for you and open up ways.

And Allaah Ta’aala knows best.
Mufti Muajul I. Chowdhury
Darul Iftaa New York

02/01/1445 AH – 08/18/2023 CE | 564

وصل اللهم وسلم وبارك على سيدنا محمد وعلى ءاله وصحبه أجمعين


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